Tuesday, July 18, 2006

still alive and well and living in beirut

one bad trick with this blog is that i receive tons of messages when i do not update it for a while. people must think i died or something. nothing like that can happen.

we're still.
we're still here.
we're still alive.
we're still waiting.
we still have nerves.
we we will never loose them.
we'll remain while the bombs will vanish.
we'll survive this shit like we survived others.

there is not much updates since yesterday because i went to see some friends and family. everybody is ok.
i didn't draw that much.
2 drawings that i made yesterday were not cool at all. i mean they were ugly.
having these kind f considerations for such trivial shit while people are killed drives me crazy. i tried to talk to this with a friend from germany in an email 2 days ago:

"anyways, music and drawing are the only things keeping me going these days.
i recorded two hours of bombs + trumpet from my balcony yesterday night.
some bombs were really close (what kind of mouthpiece do the israeli pilots use to have this sound?). the tension you get in your playing is incredible. also, i draw all time.
i always said that i regret not being adult during the war to see if you can
do something in these situations. now i feel bad to draw or play music while
people are burning. i convince myself by saying it is my only way to resist. that i have to witness. that it is very important.
but i am not really convinced. i try to be a fucking witness. to show a
little bit what's happening here. in my own way. but having regards for what
is a good drawing or a good music track drives me crazy. i cannot stop
saying after a bomb: "yeah, this one was huge. i'll leave a long silence
then make a small sound to balance the track." this is totally crazy!"

fuck art
fuck the world
fuck everything

i received an email from a lady asking me to remove her from my mailing list because she is "not used to like and hear violent language."
she also said: "i hope that your comprehension is as rapid as the speed which you use to vociferate your insults."
i removed her, but asked before if she has a better way of dealing with the situation than vociferating insults. she answered (in bold): diplomatie.
i am sure this lady has a high education degree at least. maybe a doctorate or something.

what else to say. i had a lot of thing i wanted to talk of before leaving to see evan in the mountains. i do not remember. so much things. massacres maybe?

anyways, please keep posted. i'll try to post some drawings tonight. please keep posted. it is very important. post other people. find other lebenes blogs. a lot are old and great and a lot, like mine, are flourishing everywhere (israel: thanks again for creating this "scene"). i do not have time to check other blogs and post their links. please find them.

we know you are with us. we know you are seeing us. we know you hear the fucking bombs we are hearing. we know you worry for us.
but don't.
because you know we are tough guys. you know that we'll support this shit. you know that we survived massacre and we'll do it again today. you know we'll see each other soon.
keep in touch and stay with us.


Blogger achim said...

dear mazen

i am looking to your blog as well as bechirs and others constantly! I am mailing the links around as much as i can. Little i can do, and i feel the same like you do - playing the trumpet and drawing pictures while the bombs are falling. Keep on keeping on - we will meet and play alltogether soon!!!



2:46 PM  
Blogger fairy said...

as i m home almost all the time i discovered that writing is very releasing, and sharing it with people.
it s nice to meet u here on this blog thingy.
stay safe and keep in touch.

4:41 PM  
Blogger illusion of progress said...

Yes, Mazen, these issues of the worth of art during times of carnage and devastation are serious ones. Here. in the land of the free, screaming at the top of your lungs and making art don't seem to make a dent in the world according to BXSH. And then there is the feeling of helplessness...and then the desire to engage in active resistance. But that is not what we do best. What you are doing is what you do best, and you must know that your voice and your images are resonating widely. Maybe I'm naive, but I can't help but feeling that this resonation will lead to a positive outcome and a enlightened future, not just for you and Lebanon, but for all of us. You are fighting the good fight. Don't stop, don't stop. We will all do the same, especially now that you have inspired us.

saalam, habibi,

5:09 PM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Hi Mazen,

Last night in Chicago, Charlotte Hug performed a show to a small audience in my neighborhood. It was a beautiful show, and afterwards they announced that the Tabadol Project series would have to be postponed. What sad news! We had been looking forward to seeing the performance. They announced the location of your blog to the audience, and so I linked to you today from mine: http://unprotoize.livejournal.com. You have my sincerest wishes for safety and well-being.I am praying for a ceasefire as soon as possible. Try to be brave and cautious..surely this siege can't last too much longer.

Take care,


9:52 PM  
Blogger porest said...

I had to think about that problem and came to the conclusion that no matter when I'm doing my music/art/masterbation, ETC, someone who has no art priveleges is being burned the fuck alive, tortured, dismembered, ETC. There's no way out of it...
We do what we do until we can't do it anymore.

I come from the land that makes wars happen and whose population for the most part-including the majority of artists and musicians-walk in a dreamstate, blissfully unaware and purposefuly ignorant.

I'm sharing this blog with as many people as possible.

11:00 PM  
Blogger So California said...

Keep your head up, Mazen. This, too shall pass.

I'm a Southern California artist, in love with a Lebannese woman. All hell's broken loose in her home town... Beruit. She's very afraid for her family, and is getting little sleep.

I wrote my congressman, Henry Waxman, yesterday. I asked him to speak out against the inhumanity now taking place, to reason with his Jewish and Israeli friends, to protest their destroying lives of mostly innocents.

Israeli cannot destroy Hezbolla, Hamas or all their weapons any more than we Americans can bring peace to Iraq. We're both only losing friends and making more enemies.

Mr. Bush can do little to bring about peace because he refuses to speak with our enemies and says our friends talk to much. Like a rude child, he only says shit about them.

Ms. Rice doesn't understand the meaning of diplomacy, either. It requires respect, dialogue and willingness to compromise.

Democracy doesn't mean promoting corporate hedgemony, allowing the "free" market to dominate, exploit and destroy our planet. It requires respect for other cultures, politics, and ways of life.

Freedom means PERSONAL CHOICE, local control and shared benefits of resources by all people, not just a wealthy few. It also means allowing men and women to decide for themselves who to marry, when or when not to procreate, what to research, and what to believe in... without forcing their beliefs on others.

I saw a bumper sticker, yesterday, which read:

"When the power of love conquers the love of power,
our world will be a far better place."

Well said.

11:04 PM  
Blogger fionnuala said...

Dear Mazen,

Julio sent me your blog and it has really moved me... your fortitude and resistance and above all, the way you resist expressing hate for the Israelis.

I have just seen a planeload of Spaniards arriving in Madrid from Lebanon. People are outraged at the devastation. They're talking about the biggest evacutation since WW2. What the hell is going on?

I am going to try and get or make a flag to hang in my window. You're right...the only resistance is spreading the word and showing our support for what the Lebanese people are suffering. By the way, what is the tree on it?

Keep on drawing and making music. You are right. It is necessary to record, to archive. The worst thing we can do is to forget. Because then we forget our humanity and compassion.

Everybody here in Madrid who saw you and Sharif play, and many others as well, are thinking of you and praying that the bombing will cease soon.

And to think that the only thing we have to complain about here is the heat! Shit, almost seems boring.

Nous sommes ici y j'espere que toi et Sharif et vos familles restent encore saufs. L'Achèvement m'a beacoup plu.

Take care, Fionnuala

11:35 PM  
Blogger annia said...

dear mazen

i read your blog every night, especially late at night when they're bombing and i can't sleep. i love your drawings. please keep doing them...

1:36 AM  
Blogger Maria Küchen said...

What insults? What about your blog could be insulting to anyone? I don´t understand. You ignore all conventional polarization. Just go on. Never remove me from asnything pls.

8:26 AM  
Blogger cnayla said...



Words have to fight all the evil bombs!

12:14 PM  
Blogger pablo rega said...

Hi Mazen

Keep on!!!

we are all with you my friends

I talk with some friends, and we really dont have the capacity to understand what´s feel, we have never live a situation like this.

we think about you every day

I´ll see you soon I am sure!!!



4:47 PM  
Blogger Juke said...

Don't judge the drawings right away. What seems ugly now may seem like the truth later.

2:25 AM  
Blogger Cat said...

Dear Mazin,

Heard about your blog on JJJ (Australia). You must not stop art. You must not block your freedom. Together we will never understand the reasons. They will forever continue to pick at the scab of history, just too watch her weeping sores. And we shall forever gently soothe her too comfort and protect her from the infection of world hate.
Sleep with your art, be one with your art. It is your freedom.
Stay safe.


2:42 AM  

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